The Birth Of Apollo Thomas Kurtyka

It was 12:30 on March 8th, the one day I knew Apollo wouldnt be coming since it was his due date and no babies are actually born on their due date! Steve and I were trying to decide what we were going to do with our lazy Sunday; Steve just got off the phone with his Uncle Steve, who told him that he saw something on National Geographic about a tribe of women who just start pushing down on a pregnant womans belly to get things going. I told him we would not be trying that, instead he gave me a great big hug. During the hug I felt like I wet myself after standing there for a second I told Steve what I felt and went to the bathroom. When I first sat down I heard something drain into the toilet, but when I waited for more and gently pushed, nothing more came out. So, I got on my hands and knees on the bathroom floor and did some pelvic rocking, hoping it would encourage a little more drainage, but nothing happened. I told Steve I was going to lay down for 10 minutes and then when I get up, there would be more water, so we would know it was for sure my bag of water that broke. After 10 minutes of anxiously lying down, I got up and felt nothing, so Steve and I got ready to take a walk. On the way out the door, I had a gush of fluid come out and I had no doubt anymore that my bag of water had broken.

I had a huge rush of excitement; I had secretly been asking that everything started with my bag of water breaking, so that way I would really know things were going to happen.

Steve and I decided to go for a walk still, it was at that time that I felt everything between us deepened a bit even though we had been on the path to parenthood for the past nine months, this was really it; we were going to work together to bring our child into the world now, its something that I cant really put into words, but I knew we were reaching a new level in our relationship, a very spiritual level and I couldnt wait for what was in store.

During our walk, I was starting to gush fluid, so I told Steve I wanted to go back home. We decided to watch a movie, since contractions hadnt started and we wanted to stay distracted. I alerted my sister that our little man would be coming sometime soon and she notified friends and family for me, so I wouldnt have to worry about people hounding me. Steve and I spent the rest of the afternoon and evening together in quiet excitement, knowing that finally we were going to meet this little man who was going to change our lives forever.

Ella came back from her Dads house around 8, I was so happy she was there, my family was all together now. She was so excited that she was going to meet her brother soon, she could hardly contain herself. We watched Madagascar 2 together and then took a nice walk outside; it was such a beautiful evening, with a slight chill in the air and the feeling that big things were coming soon!

Around 9pm Jen (my sister) and Amanda (my niece) came over to spend the night, and later my mom came up from San Diego. Steve and I went to sleep around 10, I was admittedly a little disappointed nothing had happened yet. I remained positive though, thankful that I would get some sleep before everything got going at least. We went to sleep listening to my Hypnobabies CD, relaxing me and putting me to sleep quickly.

I woke around 6:30 in the morning on March 9th, the first thing I said to myself was, I cant believe Im still pregnant! Sue, my midwife had told me to call her in the morning if I was still pregnant, but I didnt want to bother her yet, so I went out into the living room (leaving Steve and Ella snoring away in the bedroom) and woke my sister. We chatted a little bit, but my sister was pretty tired, so I let her be for a while. I waited until 7 and called Sue. She gave me my choices (hospital, wait and do nothing, or try to get things stimulated), I chose to stimulate things. First thing Sue told me to do was get a nice big breakfast in me, then start alternating between blue and black cohosh tinctures every hour. So I woke everyone up and we went to Mothers market to get the tinctures and then had a great breakfast at IHOP.

While at IHOP I noticed my contractions coming every 15 minutes or so. They werent too strong, I was able to talk through them no problem. I was really excited that my body was starting to get going on its own. Once home I did start the blue and black cohosh and just hung out with my family.

We all took a little walk down the street, it was so nice to be outside, feeling the ocean air on my face and having those I love with me, supporting me. This was the perfect day to bring my baby out to meet the world.

My Mom and Sister went and got some lunch for us around 1:30. My contractions were still coming every 10 minutes or so and not very strong. At 2 I was to start a castor oil smoothie, if things werent getting more intense, so we started making that after lunch was over.

Times and events are a bit blurry for me after this point, but I know my Midwives, Sue and Lindsey told me they were on their way to the hospital because another client of theirs had a retained placenta. I was fine with them being busy, I didnt feel like anything was going to happen soon anyway.

I was about 3-4 sips into my castor oil smoothie and my contractions were about 5 minutes apart. Lindsey called and told me to stop drinking it, because they didnt want me to go to fast and not have them there. They let me know that they called a back up Midwife (another Sue!) and she would be there in a bit.

One of my best images of my birthing is when I was in the backyard with Steve, Ella, Jen, Amanda, my mom and Sarah (my friend). We were all just enjoying the beautiful weather, every time I got a contraction, I would use my peace cue (from Hypnobabies) and rest on the table or on Steve. Many times, I would feel hands on my back or shoulder, hands of my loved ones, giving me their strength through every contraction. I loved this part of my labor.

I came inside after a while, my contractions were much closer now, probably about 2-3 minutes apart. I wanted my friend Casandra there, because shes assisted at many births and I knew if Apollo decided to come soon, she could at least help. After only being inside for about 10 minutes, Casandra and Lily (photographer) were there, I was very relieved. At that point, I think my body relaxed a little more and things got noticeably stronger.

Not long after that, Sue, the backup midwife got there. She immediately listened to Apollos heartbeat, that was the best sound to me. Once she was there and I heard my little man, I totally let go and let my body totally take over.

Things got intense FAST!

They soon filled up the birth pool and I got in. Steve got in with me and I remember how protected I felt when I sat back on him and felt like I just curled my entire body into him. He held me, protected me and loved me. He put my headphones on me and I listened to my birth guide script. This really focused me so much and I was glad he thought to use this now. Ella, Casandra and perhaps others (I never had my eyes open) were wiping me down with washcloths and it felt excellent. I was surrounded in love.

Soon, my midwives Sue and Lindsey arrived. I remember looking over at them and smiling, again, relieved that they were there. It wasnt long after that that I started to wonder if I could take much more of the intensity, I doubted myself. Sue checked me and said I was 4cm, this was unbelievable to me, I knew I had to be further, but I wasnt! I know it was soon after this I started vomiting with so much force it just shook my whole body. After discussing this with my midwife later I realized that this was helping my body fully dilate. My sister said she saw blood coming out each time (a sign I was dilating), so my body was just helping push things along for me. How amazing our bodies are! I was giving up on myself mentally, but my body was pushing along, dilating and effacing me quickly. Now I have learned that trust is essential, I know now to trust my body completely, it always knew what to do and how to do it.

Since I was losing my mental strength, Sue suggested Steve and I be alone. So we went into our bedroom. I found it very hard to get comfortable in there and was just on my knees with my face on the bed. As I got weaker mentally, Steve got stronger. He somehow knew all the right things to say, he got me through the hardest parts with just his words.

I have no idea who suggested it, but Steve and I were in the shower next. I honestly hated this, position-wise, I wanted to be on my hands and knees or closer to the ground, instead I was standing and leaning in the shower. This was my favorite part overall between Steve and I. Steve told me things while in the shower that I will keep with me forever, just thinking of the things he said now makes me want to cry. I fell in love with him a million times over in that moment. Even though I was saying I couldnt do it, at that point, I knew I wanted to do it and that I could do it, because of him.

When we got out of the shower, Steve encouraged me into the pool again, but I said no. I wanted to go back into the room, I have no clue why I chose this, but it was where my spirit pulled me. While in the room, on my hands and knees, I kept thinking that since the shower, I felt Apollo moving down. I wondered if I should push with this feeling. So, I tried it. I instantly wanted to get on the ground, so I remember looking down and seeing Tenaya, our dog, and just thinking, oh well! I plopped myself on the ground next to her and pushed. Sue was asking if I was pushing, but she didnt need an answer, she knew I was and quickly yelled out to the living room for the other midwife to get the birth supplies. Steve told me he remembered looking down and seeing Apollos head!

I really loved pushing, I wish I would have done it sooner, when I had felt him moving down. This was for sure my favorite part. I know I pushed a couple times and yelled (Ella said that scared her!) but it felt really good to be vocal. After just a few pushes he was out, born into his Daddys (and the midwifes) hands! I couldnt believe it!!! He was wrapped up awkwardly in his cord, so it took a minute before I saw him. He was brought up to my chest and I was overcome with emotion. I knew Ella was up at my head and soon Steve was too, Apollo was in my arms and I was, at that very moment, 100% complete.

Everyone had flooded into the room when they heard me pushing, so the room was filled with so much love when he entered it. I am so thankful for this. There were no cold, sterile rooms, no nurses or doctors to take him to the warming table; instead there was a room filled with happiness and love, our son was never taken from our arms.


Fast forward about 4 hours, the house was cleared of all our guests; Steve, Ella, Apollo and I were all laying in bed together. I looked at my family and tears came to my eyes, this is what it feels like to be complete, to feel whole

Apollos stats:
Born: 3/09/2009 at 7pm
7lbs10oz
21 in long

Just more reason not to smoke...

Its always disgusted me when I see pregnant women smoking, in fact, I've heard about pregnant women smoking just so they would have low birth weight babies.. Those women just shouldn't be allowed to have children, in my own humble opinion!

Here is more reason why smoking during or soon after pregnancy is not ok!

Children Whose Mothers Smoked During Pregnancy And Early Childhood More Likely To Smoke As Adults

ScienceDaily (May 21, 2009) — Children of mothers who smoked during pregnancy and their early childhood years may be predisposed to take up smoking as teens and young adults, compounding the physical damage they sustained from the smoke exposure.

"It is well-known that maternal smoking influences a developing fetus in myriad ways, contributing to low birth weight, premature birth and a host of other health problems after birth," said Roni Grad, M.D., associate professor of clinical pediatrics at the University of Arizona College of Medicine. "Previous studies have suggested that maternal smoking during pregnancy may increase the risk of the offspring becoming regular smokers as adults, but the impact of postnatal cigarette smoke exposure was hard to differentiate from prenatal exposure."

The study results will be presented on May 19, at the American Thoracic Society's 105th International Conference in San Diego.

To determine the impact of maternal smoking during pregnancy and early childhood, the on the smoking behavior of the offspring as young adults, the researchers used data from the Tucson Children's Respiratory Study. Maternal smoking during pregnancy, at nine days, 1.5 months and 1.5 years was used to assess smoke exposure during pregnancy and the early life of the child. Maternal smoking was further assessed at ages six, nine and eleven years to evaluate smoke exposure during the school age years of the child. The smoking behavior of the offspring was then assessed at ages 16 and 22 years.

The researchers found that maternal smoking during pregnancy and the early childhood years was associated with the offspring being regular smokers at the age of 22, independent of whether the mother smoked during the school age years of the child. Furthermore, of all of the offspring who had ever smoked, offspring of mothers who smoked during pregnancy and early life were less likely to quit than those of mothers who had never smoked or who had taken up the habit only when the child reaches the school age years. Finally, the impact of early maternal smoking was independent of the effect of paternal smoking and also the effect of exposure to peer smoking during the offspring's adolescence. The greatest impact on the smoking behavior of the offspring as young adults was linked to .

"Smoking during pregnancy by mothers who stopped smoking by the time the child reached the school age years is a risk factor for smoking in their offspring during early adulthood," said Dr. Grad. "The data suggest that a biological effect is in play, and that eliminating maternal smoking during pregnancy and the preschool years of the child will reduce the risk of her children becoming regular smokers in adulthood. In children of mothers who did smoke during this critical period, it is important to prevent experimentation with tobacco during the adolescent years."

OC Register Article about birth

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

How do you want to deliver?

Women need to do their homework on birthing options available today.

By CARINE NADEL

For The Orange County Register

So, you're pregnant. Congratulations! Now comes the interesting part: How do you want to deliver?

Denise Spatafora, a life coach in New York, has written "Better Birth, The Ultimate Guide to Childbirth from Home Births to Hospitals" to help moms-to-be make the best choice for themselves.

Local professionals also have advice to offer about the options women have.

We spoke with Dr. David Lagrew, medical director of Women's Hospital at Saddleback Memorial Medical Center in Laguna Hills; Lorri Walker, a midwife at South Coast Midwifery and Women's Health Care in Irvine; and BJ Snell of the Community Alliance for Birth Options in Laguna Hills.

All agree that for starters, women should thoroughly educate themselves about what pregnancy is and what kind of birth would give them the best possible emotional, mental, physical and spiritually rich experience – even if something out of the ordinary happens and they have to change delivery types at the last moment.

"Too much of the time the unknown of the birth process creates fear for women," Spatafora said. "That was my main goal, to give women the tools to educate themselves and give them all they needed to make choices that would give them the ultimate birthing experience."

She's had clients who intended to have a home birth with a midwife, but had to change their focus to a hospital-based delivery because something during their pregnancy made home delivery an unsafe option.

"This doesn't mean that they can't have the same wonderfully memorable, fear-free experience," Spatafora said. "This just means that they have to become OK with the new and needed option, learn all they can about the procedure and realize that it will still be an intimate event."

Spatafora gave birth to her two children at home in water, with a midwife.

"That was my way and it worked out. For someone else, the best way might be in a hospital setting, or a birthing suite at a birthing center."

Lagrew says the family birthing suites at Women's Hospital at Saddleback Memorial can offer the best of both possible worlds.

"While many are encouraging home births, we feel that the center can give the mom and partner the same experience, but in a safe setting," he said. "Should the need arise, immediate intervention is available."

The hospital encourages the use of a Jacuzzi, but not water births, he said.

"We have education classes for the basics, for high-risk pregnancies, VBAC (vaginal birth after C-section), post-partum and daddy boot camp. We also have birthing beds, rocking chairs and music. Our policy is that if the request is safe and a comfort to the mom, we will provide it."

Both Lorri Walker and BJ Snell said that options in Orange County – and at hospitals in particular – are limited. Most hospitals don't allow midwives access, they said. Walker and Snell both see a sharp rise in the county for out-of-hospital births.

Giving birth, Walker said, is "a natural function that women need to gain control of by making it a more 'green' experience, educating themselves in a way that fits their lifestyle, gives them control and makes the event quite intimate."

Birthing centers give women lots of freedom, Snell added: "They can have family and friends in if they wish. We don't use IV's – the moms are able to walk, eat, drink. We don't readily use episiotomies."

Walker and Snell both agreed that birthing centers are not for all women. If a woman is having a high-risk pregnancy for any reason, she needs to use the traditional hospital setting, they said.

Women do need someone to be their guide, and for most that means a doctor.

A new way to battle the blues

What are the “baby blues?”
Over 80% of new mothers suffer from mood instability starting in the first week after giving birth. Dubbed the "baby blues", it is considered a normal part of birth recovery. Symptoms of the baby blues include weepiness, sadness and anxiety, and these negative emotions can last for the first several weeks of the new baby's life. Since the hormonal fluctuations at the root of the issue eventually regulate themselves, no treatment is given. Women are left to cope on their own, losing the first precious weeks with their newborn baby to an emotional rollercoaster and exhaustion.

A different postpartum experience
Birth recovery does not have to be so difficult. Nature has provided you with all you need to restore what is lost during pregnancy and birth. Your placenta! The placenta contains a woman's own natural hormones, as well as iron, protein and other nutrients, providing the means to replenish and nourish her body.

This may sound like a new concept; however the placenta has been used in Traditional Chinese Medicine for centuries to treat lactation and fatigue. Other cultures also honor the placenta and recognize it as being something sacred. Many Native American tribes bury the placenta to bind the child with its native land. The Ibo of Nigeria and Ghana consider the placenta to be the baby's twin. Aymara and Quecha peoples of Bolivia say that the placenta has its own spirit. Malaysians consider the placenta to be the older sibling to the child. When the baby smiles unexpectedly, it is said that he is playing with his brother.

I know what you are thinking though,
“That’s great for them, but how is it going to help me beat the after baby blues?”
First, try not to get stuck on the “ew factor” that a lot of people have; there is a way of receiving all of the placentas many benefits, without ever having to see or touch the placenta itself, through placenta capsules (prepared by an encapsulation specialist).

I am a Placenta Encapsulation Specialist (trained through PlacentaBenefits.info), which means I am trained to put your placenta in capsule form for you, in the privacy of your own home. The encapsulation process closely follows the Traditional Chinese Medicine method of draining (taking out most of the blood), steaming and dehydrating the placenta in preparation for the encapsulation process. Once the capsules are ready, mom is presented with a beautiful blue bottle full of capsules that can help make her transition to motherhood a smoother one.

For those that are still getting stuck on the “ew factor”, let me assure you again that you never have to see anything during the encapsulation process and your home is left just as clean, if not cleaner, than when I got there. Every mother that I have helped has said the benefits they have experienced through ingesting the placenta capsules far outweigh any uneasiness they may have felt about the process beforehand.

Placenta encapsulation is a universal option that resonates with women all over the world. Since launching PlacentaBenefits.info, Jodi Selander has been contacted by women from the United States, Canada, Britain, New Zealand, Australia, Malaysia, Germany, China, Singapore and elsewhere, enthusiastic about the wellness provided within the placenta. There are already around 40 Placenta Encapsulation Specialists in the US and several more in training, so women everywhere can reap the rewards their placenta provides.

Women undergo a huge transition after having a baby, and the massive hormonal and emotional fluctuations are just the tip of the iceberg. They are looking for a natural, healthy and practical way to have the best postpartum experience possible. Nature has provided a simple means to make the transition to motherhood easier for women and more peaceful for the entire family. The old adage holds true – if Mama’s not happy, nobody’s happy.

Introduction

My name is April, I am Momma to Ella who is 9 and Apollo who is 2 1/2 months. I have a company, Confident Beginnings which specializes in making the transition to parenthood as smooth as possible.

I teach childbirth, breastfeeding and baby care classes, provide lactation consultant services, placenta encapsulation, and pregnancy concierge services.

I'm new to the blogging world, (a bit late, I know), but hope to share insights and articles to empower women and their families!

Remembering the Pearls of Mothering Advice

As a new or expecting mom, it seems you are open to a lot of unwanted and un-asked-for advice. It's easy to feel overwhelmed by it all. It's hard to sift through it and figure out what to listen to and what to toss. Sometimes we even feel resentful when we heed someone's advice and find that it really doesn't work for us. And often, the well-meant tips and suggestions leave us feeling judged and inadequate. But sometimes, we stumble on some great wisdom and we're grateful that someone shared it with us.

Sunday was my 4th Mother’s Day and in that short time (oh but it seemed long, didn't it?) I am amazed how often I've completely changed my mind about parenting specifics. As I look back, I begin to see that my parenting boils down to a few generalities and otherwise, there is a lot of room for improvisation. Always. There isn't a lot of advice that remained constant through it all. Yet, if I had to pinpoint three things that I’m glad someone told me as a new mom they would be:

Sleeping

Whether you co-sleep or use a crib in another room, whether you parent to sleep or teach baby to self soothe, whether you believe in schedules or flexibility, it is helpful to know this:

Little babies can only be up for about two hours before they are tired again. Knowing this can make all the difference in how your days unfold. Knowing this can soften sleep struggles. Take note of when they get up and watch them after about two hours. It’s easier to put a sleepy baby to bed than to fight a baby who is either over-tired or not tired at all.

Eating

If you can, breastfeed. It’s the best choice for mom and baby. There are health benefits for both of you. But more importantly, it’s not just a way of feeding baby. It’s a beautiful relationship. It’s not always easy and there are definitely areas where support could be improved from community, employers, governments and often, families and friends. But it’s worth it. If you are struggling, find help from La Leche League, Dr. Jack Newman, Kellymom, a lactation consultant or public health nurse. You’ll be glad you did.

Parenting

Do What Works. I learned this from my older sister, mother of four. This means do what works for your family. Trust your gut and if something is working for you, keep doing it. Don’t worry about what other people or experts think you should be doing. Just do what works. And be ready to change your methods because what works today might not work tomorrow. What works for this child might not work for the next one. Parenthood is an ever changing evolving practice. It will take lots of rearranging to strike a balance between what works for your kids and what works for you but if you keep at it, you can’t go wrong.

How about you? What pearls of wisdom were you grateful for as a new mother?

---

Sweet Home Birth Boxes - the supplies you need no matter what your birth plan includes!

International Day of the Midwife

Today is International Day of the Midwife. This special occasion is near and dear to my heart. Both of my children were born with the help of midwives and I have spent the last 3 years spreading the word about how wonderful they are.

I exhibited at the 2007 Canadian Association of Midwifery conference in Vancouver. The conference was held in Vancouver that year to also celebrate the 10th anniversary of the legalisation of midwifery in BC. At the conference, I bought a t-shirt that quickly became my favourite (coincidentally, I was even wearing it when I went into labour with my daughter last year) because of the colour, the fabric (organic cotton) and the message - 10 years of Registered Midwives. When I wear this t-shirt I often get asked if I am a midwife (sadly, the answer is no) and I always reply, "No. I just really like midwives!"

Most of my friends have also had the opportunity to experience midwifery care so I occasionally get the mistaken impression that it's more widespread than it is. Ann Douglas recently shared some of the results of the Canadian Maternity Experiences Survey and I was shocked to discover that only 6.1% of births are attended by midwives.

I was well aware that though Vancouver struggles with a shortage of midwives I was lucky to live there because other communities have no midwives at all. I fervently believe that we need more midwives. Even so, I didn't realise the numbers were as low as they are.

The theme for this year's International Day of the Midwife is The World Needs Midwives Now More Than Ever and you can read some info about this from a global perspective at the International Confederation of Midwives website.

What does the picture look like in Canada?

Midwifery is legal and government funded in the Western provinces and Ontario and Quebec. However, the territories and Maritime provinces are still struggling to have midwifery recognized and paid for through the healthcare system.

Province	Regulated	Provincially funded	Practising midwives	Link
British Columbia	yes	yes	120	bcmidwives.com
Alberta	yes	in process*	30	albertamidwives.com
Saskatchewan	yes	yes	5	saskatchewanmidwives.com
Manitoba	yes	yes	40	midwives.mb.ca
Quebec	yes	yes	100	canadianmidwives.org
Ontario	yes	yes	450	aom.on.ca
New Brunswick	in process	no	1	canadianmidwives.org
Nova Scotia	in process*	no	7	canadianmidwives.org
PEI	no	no	1	canadianmidwives.org
Newfoundland and Labrador	no	no	n/a	canadianmidwives.org
Yukon	no	no	1	canadianmidwives.org
Northwest Territories	yes	yes	3	canadianmidwives.org
Nunavut	in process	partial funding	3	canadianmidwives.org

Source: Today's Parent, March 2009

Some good news:
Despite government regulation since 1998, Alberta just agreed to publicly fund midwifery. The deal was finalized in early April of this year.

Nova Scotia has also proclaimed the Act Respecting Midwifery but have limited coverage to only a few districts within the province.

Some bad news:
The shortage of midwives is quite real and according to this recent Maclean's article on the Midwife Crisis, it is just a part of a larger crisis within maternity care in Canada. The article's byline goes so far as to say that "it's a bad time to have a baby in Canada."

And in Ottawa, despite the fact that Ontario is one of the provinces that recognizes and funds midwifery care, there's been a major step backward - the Ottawa Hospital has closed its doors to midwives.

What Can You Do To Support Midwifery in Canada?

• Spread the word—tell your friends, family, co-workers about midwifery


• Share positive stories about midwives, doulas and birth


• Donate to your local midwifery association


• Join an advocacy group:
  
  • Midwifery Coalition of Nova Scotia
  • BORN PEI
  • Yukoners for Funded Midwifery
  • Learn more about midwifery in our northern communities - Inuit Midwifery Network
  • Association for Safe Alternatives in Childbirth

---

Sweet Home Birth Boxes - the supplies you need no matter what your birth plan includes!